THAILAND - Mai Hong Son - Part 2

I actually slept really well the first night in the monastery grounds. I think I was very excited to get up early the next day for rice offerings and breakfast. We had our alarms set for 5:15 a.m. just so we could pull ourselves together before morning chanting. The sun was still down and the hums of everyone in the hall was the most unique experience ever. So early and your brain is working at a different level, but also trying to find enlightenment, and fighting sleepiness, its strange, but also super cool. Once chanting was done ladies started bringing huge pots of cooked white rice. They put the pots on the table and everyone help scoop the rice into 50 tiny white bowls accompanied with spoons. Once that was done we all helped pass them to people. It was interesting how everyone helped equally, and there was no real leader. After that was done the monks rang the bell and the monastery dog howled along with it. Everyone sat around the sides of the hall, men and woman separated. The monks would first walked to the side where all the men were lined up sitting on their knees. I saw that there were 8 monks coming. And you had to make sure to give each monk a serving of rice. I was already fretting over how I was going to split this tiny little bowl of rice into 8 equal servings! But it was too early to fret so I looked to the side of me and saw some lady taking her spoon and chopping up the rice into scoop sized portions, naturally I did the same. The monks were making their way down the line fairly quickly, and when they were only 3 people away I sat up on my knees and watched how the others gave the offerings. The first monk came to me, he was the older one, and didn’t acknowledge me much, his eyes were very tired, but naturally. I bowed my head and raised the bowl and spoon of rice towards him, them poured the rice in his copper rice bowl that was hung off his shoulder under his robbed. Such a beautiful bowl I thought to myself. After the initial offering was done the 7 other monks came quick and I repeated my motions. I couldn’t think to much about the whole process otherwise I would drop rice on the floor. I wasn’t sitting next to Moni but I watched her offer rice after I was done. I then watch the monks make their way down the female side. I just sat peacefully thinking about how interesting this religion was. I didn’t know it was possible for me to think so deeply and thoughtfully this early in the morning. Once the monks were done they all walked to the front of the alter and hide their brass bowls under there robes and sang a little hymn to us. It was beautiful. I think this was their way of saying thank you for the offerings. Then they walked out of the hall and disappeared. Everyone then got up and more ladies came from the kitchen bringing more rice and vegetables to the eating hall right next to the Dhama hall. It was breakfast time. By now it was around 6:50 a.m. and I was starving after we did so much already! Serving ourselves, Moni and I grabbed as much as we could. We did this since eating after 12 was not allowed, so better to get stuffed now to keep us going. It smelled really good, but we tested our patience in the long line. I was surprised at how many people were here. I think I would like it better with less people. But hey! I still enjoyed it because you can’t always get what you want. Once Moni and I got our food we sat down together and then got up to get some tea and coffee at the tea station. All they had was instant lattes and jasmine green tea. So I started with the latte, but also went back for tea after I ate. No one really talked during this time. Moni sat across from me and we smiled at each other while we chewed, still confused at all this newness. After breakfast was over we all had to wash our dishes and be back in the Dhama hall for morning meditation practice. At this time Moni and I walked back to the dorms to relax a bit and read the chanting book to see where to even start! We then heard the bell ringing and the dog howling, it was time to go meditate. We all helped set out the mats and booklets and took our seats. The monks walked in single file. Got up on the alter, bowed, and they all turned to face the statues except one monk. He had a microphone with him and greeted us in Thai and English, his English was very good actually! He then started to talk about Buddhism, meditation, and enlightenment. This went on for about 20 minutes of teaching. He had some helpful tips about trying to clear the mind and separate mind and body from each other. When you sit and meditate, he said to think of the Thai words breath in, “Bhu”, and out, “Doh”. So when you sit and breath in, say “Bhu” in your head, and the breath out saying “Doh”. This was very helpful since I had no idea where to start in trying to clear my mind. After teachings was done we got up for walking meditation. I had no idea what that entailed so I followed other in getting up and having the monks walk out of the hall into the paved walkway in a single file. All the men followed, then the women. We were all barefoot and wearing white. Soon the line grew to a huge length that I lost sight of the head monk. We walked very very slow, I mean very slow. One foot after the other. Looking down at the ground or feet in front of you. We walked over the first bridge and then turned left to start walking the edge of this vast green lawn with a pond in the middle of it, color flowers form the trees had fallen on the ground and gave the walk a bit of cheer. I kept trying to clear my mind and separate what my body felt, I tried to think of it as a capsule that my mind was inside of. But this meant I was thinking. To not think is hard. I also was noticing the pond, lawn, and flowers. Once again, thinking. Every once in a while I would get it but then the slightest thought got me lost in the clouds of daydreaming. This battle was going on in my head through the whole walk around the lawn. We crossed the first bridge we did at the start and then walked towards the Dhama hall. It took a while for everyone to get back, but the monks started speaking about sitting meditation next for 30 minutes. I looked at the clock when I finally got back from walking and it was 9:00 a.m. already! Walking that really short distance took about 45 minutes, but if I walked it regularly it would have taken 10 minutes. We then sat criss-cross and closed our eyes to meditate. I tried the monks little tip about breathing but I lost concentration a few times. I promised myself to keep my eyes closed the entire time. The whole 30 minutes. And it actually went by really fast. Next was 30 minutes laying down meditation. So everyone turned around and pointed heads towards Buddha, thats a rule, and laid down. I was kind of excited for this, since I could sleep. I’ve been up 5 hours already, so I deserved it. I knew I was supposed to meditate but I really wanted to sleep, and I figured I tried very hard for the first day and maybe tomorrow I could do it… And the frail voice of the head monk came onto the microphone asking everyone to get up. That was fast. He recapped what we had learned that day and wish everyone a great morning. They taught us the prayer we had to say every time we finished a session. It was a series of praying hand motions to the head, chest, and ground, and repeated saying “Onchala, Wawdeeca, Ypeedie”. After that, which would take me a few days to get it right, we all got up and clean the mats and books and went over to the table that had more pots of rice and bowls. It was time for the second offering. We all grabbed a bowl and I chopped my rice up in sections and got in a place to offer. The bell rang, the dog howled, and the monks came. Down the line and then to me to receive. Once again they sang to us and disappeared behind the bell tower. Afterwards the ladies brought more rice and vegetables and we served ourselves lunch at 10:50 a.m. Already Moni and I were starving! So we loaded our plates again and sat with each other. By this time it started getting hot out. In the morning it was pretty cold so some people had white jackets or brought their blankets, which was approved by the monastery as okay to do. After lunch, I noticed this man, alone, he was watching Moni and I early this morning in the same way he was right now. He had dreads tied up in a messy tail. I tried to pretend I didn’t notice and I really had no desire to talk to him, or anyone really. It was only a matter of time before Moni would notice and talk to him. We carried on and washed our dishes. After it was about an hour before afternoon meditation. Moni and I walked to the pond that was right outside of the women’s dorm hall. It was so pretty here sitting under the tree with flowers. The koi fish were eating the flowers that dropped into the water. Occasionally they made a splash. Moni and I talked about what we thought of the place so far. She wanted to try and challenge herself to stay longer that 3 days, maybe 10! I said that I was willing to maybe come back in my future for a longer experience. But so far I liked it. It felt like I had been here for a few days already, yet it wasn’t even noon. I went into the dorms to write down in my journal and read about Buddhism, given the books in the library. I heard the bells and walked outside to see everyone moseying towards the hall. I could see by the bell tower the monks in a circle ringing the bell. Standing so still. The dog howled again and again, like it had no idea what the bell was after all these years still. It was around 1 p.m. and everyone took there seats. I still had some trouble staying in this criss-cross legs position, after a while my legs would be like needles from goin numb. Once everyone had taken their seats, including the monks, it was time to start our second session of meditation for the day. This time there was more monks joining us, some were as young as maybe 13 and some old as 80 or something. The head monk started speaking over the microphone again about our practices. I learned a lot in each 20 minute session. It was so hard to grasp the concept that mind and body and soul are all separate in the Buddhist world. And to me that seemed a little odd, but I accepted it as practice that people believe in. Afterwards I had many great conversations with Moni about it. Once the lesson was over we all got up for an hours worth of walking meditation. This time we crossed the first bridge and then continued straight to walk up these stairs that led to the base of the mountains that surrounded us. It was hard not to pay attention to all the caves and statues that had made little shrines in the mountains belly. This is where a lot of monks would come to meditate in their free time, or most of their time I guess. We continued walking barefoot until the path turned to dirt. It narrowed and soon we were engulfed in the forest. The light of the sun twinkle between the leaves of the canopy. If you looked up it was heaven, the wild bird sounds and the silence. The light breeze that gave you a breath of fresh air on this humid day. But after a while I just focused on being here, the present, my breathing, my body feeling. Then it moved to me separating my mind and body. My mind floated above me and my walking capsule continued on the path like a good soldier. In a sense I felt I lost control of my feet walking, I could not tell them to stop with my mind even if I wanted to. This went on for a few minutes it felt, then I regained the feeling in my feet and the earth underneath it. I DID IT! I separated my mind and body, not sure about the soul yet, but maybe later. The rest of the walk I kept going in and out of this trance. I came aware as soon as I saw to the side of me the head monk passing going the other way. I looked ahead and the path looped around to head back. When I got to the very end near the mountain wall, I saw a ladder that lead up to a small cave with an alter. Super cool. We continued back on the path, and I continued to try and practice, but the day was getting hot and my mind was foggy. I decided that I tried hard enough the first half of the walk and now I could just enjoy nature in itself, which for me is kind of my own religion. I know I shouldn't practice"other" religions while on the ground of a monastery, but it felt good. The forest was amazing. Instead of going all the way back the way we came, we took a slight right towards the monk housing. They were simple brown huts that didn't have much, but some had little wind chimes outside that were nice to hear walking by. There were maybe about 30 of them, but we walked passed only a few. I also noticed on the trees next to us there were signs posted in Thai and some in English, the had little saying that were really neat and inspiring. We got back to the Dhama hall, lots of people went to the water spout to clean their feet from the dirt path we were on. The head monk started talking again about moving on to sitting and laying down meditation. The heat was getting to me, but I did well in sitting meditation. Once laying down mediation came I fell right back to sleep. The heat, the sleepiness, it got to me. After that was all over we said our thank you prayer and we had some free time. It was around 3:30 p.m. now and we had 30 minutes of free time before we had to start mindless work around the grounds. Moni and I went to the dorm to get out of the heat and relax a bit. Everything still new and weird. It still felt like we have been here for ages even though we were only half way through the first day. Once 4 p.m. came along it was time to start work. This included either sweeping the grass of leaves, cleaning the kitchen, sweeping the floors, cleaning the Dhama hall, filling water containers in the eating hall. Some of the people who stayed a long time had the option of arranging the dropped flowers in pretty patterns around the walkways and trees. So every morning there would be pretty arrangements of flowers everywhere, super cool. The point of this mindless work is to not think and just do. Go through the motions and find peace with that. I liked it because I got very into sweeping this one section of grass until it was spotless. I wasn’t near anyone so I could just focus, I didn’t think about anything or anyone, just the grass, the rake, the leaves, and my body cleaning. I think this type of mindless meditation really worked for me rather than staying still. Everyone has their little tricks I guess to find peace within. The hour went by really fast. After I found Moni and we went to go have some tea in the eating hall. This is where the guy with dreads who had been watching us from a distance finally approached us in conversation. Simple words, he was Spanish I could tell from his accent. Moni really liked him I think. We talked about the usually, where you are from, where are you going, why are you here, etc. I still was stand offish from him but he grew slightly on me. I just thought he was some traveler just trying to get with some girls, but in the end that wasn’t the case, and Im glad to have met such a pure sole. He reminded me of a calmer version of my best friend Steve from back home. He found the beauty and excitement in the world around him. It was nice to have a third party with Moni and I to break up our constant being with each other. We talked a while over tea before evening meditation at 6 p.m. In the middle of our conversation the ground keeper that helped us check in came to us saying we should keep our valuables with us at all times because the lockers int he dorms were unreliable. This got me super paranoid for some reason so Moni and I from then on carried a bag with us of our cameras, money, and other things. It was a little annoying to always have it on you, even during meditation times, but it felt better that way. So before evening chanting we got our bags and headed over to take a seat. The bells rang, the dog howled, and the monks came. We bowed and then started chanting on the evening chanting page of the book. The songs were amazing! So beautiful and moving. I felt the energy coming from everyone. And to try to read the book and sing on the spot took a lot of concentration that stopped you from thinking about everything else. Just the vibration of your vocal chords in your body. We chanted for about 45 minutes and then went on to sitting meditation, then laying meditation. This time I was able to really practice again because it was cooler at night and easier to focus on separating body and mind rather than sweating. We closed our eyes at sitting meditation and didn’t open until after laying down meditation. When I closed my eyes it was light out, and when I opened the whole Hall was pitch black. And everyone was meditating, silence. Moving one toe at a time, then the fingers, then the limbs, we slowly came out of laying meditation, said our ending prayer, and cleaned up the mats and books. It was a good day. I think I made a lot of progress with it. Afterwards Moni and I met Etien, the guy with dreads, over by the teas. We talked some more about how we found his special way of meditation. He said he examines every inch of his body one section at a time, and very slowly. By the end of meditation he had checked in with his whole body! This was very helpful to me and I practiced it the next time we meditated. But it was getting late, aka 8:30 p.m. and Moni and I wanted to go back to the dorm to eat because we were starving. We had some fruit and peanut butter and that was pretty much it. Then bedtime. But this night would be one of the worst and scary moments….